Time for Me to Go, Time for You to Burn

On Children's Day, the most popular social media post is about me.

The caption is: "Mr. Shane Norton spends his birthday with his son David Norton and his first love, Ruth Feynman. Has he finally decided to divorce Ayla Sanderson?"

I quietly press the "like" button.

When my phone rings, I'm in the midst of taking down the balloons I put up for our wedding anniversary.

"Honey."

My husband sounds anxious as he tries to explain himself. "David suddenly insisted that we go to a theme park, so I—"

In the background, I hear David laughing. "Dad, Ruthie says that I can sleep with her tonight!"

I look at the mess in the house.

The balloons are drooping, and the cream on the cake is congealed.

"You don't have to explain," I hear myself say.

"I understand."

It's just that this time, I don't want you or David any longer, Shane.

Ayla Sanderson's POV

When Shane Norton brought our son, David Norton, home, I was curled up on the sofa, watching television.

In the past, I would have rushed over immediately to get his slippers and kiss David's little face.

Today, I did not move.

"Why didn't you come and kiss me today, Mom?"

"Ayla, why didn't you bring me my slippers?"

I adjusted the volume of the television. "I don't have time."

Shane put on his slippers and left David waiting for me to serve him.

"Ayla, you're not still angry over such a minor thing, are you?

"It's Children's Day today, and David suddenly wanted to go to a theme park. You wouldn't have disappointed him, would you? I couldn't handle him on my own, so I asked Ruth to come along. How many times do I have to explain this?"

Beside him, David said angrily, "Mom, you're losing your temper for no reason again! Ruthie never looks stern like you do!"

Shane ruffled David's hair and looked at me as he asked, "Did you hear that? Even David disapproves.

"Why don't you understand, Ayla? I'm showing you respect by trying to placate you. Even if you're going to have a fit, there should be limits!"

My voice was calm. "I'm not angry. I understand."

I understood everything. I understood it all too well.

It was like last year, when I'd gotten into a car accident and was bleeding heavily.

Over the phone, Shane had said impatiently, "I'm a little busy over here. I'll go soon. Call an ambulance for yourself!"

Beside him, I heard David shouting, "Come and see, Dad! Ruthie found her kitten! Comfort her and tell her to stop crying."

As I lay in a puddle of blood, I dialed 911 on my own.

When I had to sign the agreement for the operation, there was a box for family members to sign. In that box, I wrote with a trembling hand: "No family."

Shane scanned my face and sighed wearily. "Must you do this, Ayla?"

I met his eyes calmly. "What have I done?"