Her Daddy Issues

The first time I attended my girlfriend Joyce's friend gathering, after a few rounds of drinks, her male best friend pulled her onto his lap.

With a cigarette dangling between his fingers, he grinned. "Call me daddy!"

Instead of getting offended, Joyce leaned into him, helpless but indulgent, and said, "Daddy."

I froze, scowling, but she waved me off without a care.

"It's just a joke! Lucius always never cared for the rules, and everyone knows we have a father-daughter vibe, okay? Don't get it all twisted, Henry! Aren't you a man?"

Lucius became even more provocative, throwing a smoke ring at me. "Yo, son-in-law! Aren't you going to bow to me? Come on, kneel and offer me a drink, and your dad's got your back!"

Everyone at the table burst into laughter as they waited to see me lose my temper and make a scene.

I just smiled, meeting Joyce's impatient gaze with an excited expression. "That's great! I like the way you think, so why don't you call me daddy too?"

Everyone in the room froze for a moment before erupting in laughter, and even louder jeers.

"Holy crap, he's got balls!"

"Is he trying to get Lucius to call him daddy too?"

Lucius's expression froze, clearly not expecting someone who always seemed so mild-mannered as me to react in the way I did. Quickly, his expression reverted to his usual roguish grin, his hand casually sliding over Joyce's waist.

"My dear daughter, this new boyfriend of yours doesn't seem very smart. What's he trying to pull here?"

Joyce's brows furrowed, clearly displeased. "Are you an idiot, Henry? Lucius was just joking with you, so why did you have to be so rude with him? Don't you have a sense of humor?"

I replied calmly, "Wasn't he the one who told you to call him daddy first? Since he wants to be a father, why can't I want the same? Also…"

As I spoke, I raised my hand and smacked Lucius's head, hard. "Hands off your daughter, you old lecher! How could you touch her like that? You're a father, you know?!"

"Damn you!" Lucius cried out in pain and sprang to his feet, throwing the cigarette in his hand hard onto the floor. "Looks like I've been too nice with you, huh? No one talks to me like that!"

Joyce's expression darkened, and she banged her glass heavily on the table. "Apologize to him right now, Henry! I brought you here to introduce you to everyone, not to cause a scene!

"Can't you even take a joke? What a buzzkill! At this point, just leave!"

I looked at the hot cup of tea in front of me, before looking back up at Lucius's arrogant face.

Slowly, I stood up and picked up the cup of scalding tea.

Thinking I was backing down, Lucius shook his leg smugly and even gave Joyce a slap on the butt. "That's more like it, my son-in…"

Splash!

I poured the cup