Chapter 3
I slipped away from the pack house before dawn, my feet carrying me automatically toward the healing springs. For five years, I'd made this journey with hope. Today, I came with nothing but despair.
The forest was silent around me, as if holding its breath. No birds sang. No creatures rustled in the underbrush. Even the wind seemed to have abandoned these woods, leaving me truly alone with my broken heart.
When I reached the springs, their familiar shimmer did nothing to lift my spirits. Steam rose from the crystal waters, carrying the scent that had once represented possibility but now reeked of deception. I knelt by the edge, herbs clutched in my trembling hand.
"Luna, please shift with me," I whispered to my wolf. "We need to complete the ritual."
But she remained curled deep within me, refusing to emerge. I couldn't blame her. What was the point of another fertility ritual when we now knew the truth? William had never intended for us to conceive. Every prayer, every tear, every moment of self-doubt had been based on a cruel lie.
I scattered the herbs into the water anyway, watching them dissolve. The action was mechanical, devoid of the reverence I once felt.
"Please, Moon Goddess," I began, but the words caught in my throat. What was I even asking for now? Strength? Guidance? A way out?
The tears came without warning, hot and relentless. My shoulders shook with sobs that echoed through the silent woods as five years of suppressed pain finally broke free. I collapsed onto the smooth stones, curling into myself as waves of anguish washed over me.
"Why?" I cried to the empty forest. "Why wasn't I enough?"
Only silence answered.
---
Night fell, bringing with it the weight of another day survived in this new reality. I lay on the narrow bed in the guest quarters, staring at the ceiling, too exhausted to sleep. Three days had passed since the council meeting where Victoria had taken my responsibilities. Three days of sidelong glances and whispered conversations that stopped when I entered a room.
Luna stirred restlessly within me, her distress mirroring my own.
*We're dying here*, she whimpered. *Our bond is unraveling.*
I pressed my hand against my chest, feeling the hollowness where the mate bond once pulsed strong and vital. William hadn't formally rejected me—that would require a public ceremony and acknowledgment of his deception—but he might as well have. Our bond was a withered thing, poisoned by betrayal.
A sudden urge seized me. I needed air. I needed space. I needed to feel something other than this crushing despair.
I slipped outside, barefoot in my nightgown, and made my way to the small clearing behind the guest quarters. The full moon hung heavy in the sky, bathing everything in silver light.
"Luna, please," I begged my wolf. "Just for tonight. Let's run together like we used to."
For a moment, I felt her hesitation, then a reluctant stirring. The shift began—painful and slow, nothing like the seamless transformation we once shared. My bones cracked and reformed as fur sprouted across my skin. When it was done, I stood on four legs, my white wolf form smaller than it had been months ago, weakened by grief.
I lifted my muzzle to the moon and let loose a howl that carried all our pain. The sound echoed across Sterling territory, a mournful cry that spoke of betrayal and heartbreak.
No answering howls came. No pack mates joined my lament.
I howled again, louder this time, my wolf's anguish pouring out in a sound that seemed to tear the very night apart. Still, only silence answered.
In that moment, I knew with crushing certainty that I was truly alone.
---
The full moon pack run was a sacred tradition, a time when all members of the Sterling Pack shifted and ran together under the Moon Goddess's light. Despite everything, I couldn't bring myself to miss it. Some small, foolish part of me still clung to the hope that William would see me—truly see me—and remember what we once shared.
I arrived at the gathering point just as William called the pack to order. His massive black wolf form stood proud on the ceremonial rock, Victoria's russet wolf at his side where I should have been. The sight sent a fresh wave of pain through me.
When William gave the signal, the pack surged forward as one, powerful bodies moving in perfect harmony through the forest. I ran with them but at the edges, no longer in my place beside the Alpha. My white wolf form, once admired for its rare coloring, now felt like a beacon highlighting my isolation.
As we reached the heart of the territory, Luna suddenly veered away from the main group.
*The Moon Grove*, she urged. *We need to go there.*
I followed her instinct, breaking away from the pack and heading toward the sacred grove where William and I had performed our mating ceremony five years ago. Perhaps there, in that hallowed place, I could find some peace or clarity.
The Moon Grove was a perfect circle of ancient oak trees surrounding a small clearing carpeted with luminescent white flowers that bloomed only under the full moon. As I approached, a familiar scent stopped me in my tracks.
William was there. And he wasn't alone.
I crept closer, staying downwind and hidden in the shadows of the massive trees. In the center of the grove, William's black wolf circled Victoria's russet form. Their movements were intimate, playful in a way he had never been with me. As I watched, frozen in place, his massive wolf form pressed against hers, his muzzle nuzzling her neck in a possessive gesture before marking her with his scent.
The sight shattered something fundamental inside me. This was the grove where he had promised himself to me under the Moon Goddess's light. Now he profaned that sacred place with another.
Luna howled within me, a sound of such profound betrayal that I couldn't contain it. The cry tore from my throat, echoing through the grove and causing both wolves to freeze.
William's golden eyes found mine in the darkness, and in them, I saw not guilt or remorse, but irritation at being interrupted.
In that moment, something changed. The last fragile thread of hope I'd been clinging to snapped completely.
I turned and ran, leaving behind the grove, the pack, and the last remnants of the life I had tried so desperately to build here.
There was nothing left for me in the Sterling Pack. It was time to go.
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